| 161 | A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance. |
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| 162 | A judge is a law student who marks their own examination papers. |
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| 163 | A jump-leads walks into a bar, acting aggresively. The barman says "All right, I'll serve you... but don't start anything."
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| 164 | A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything." |
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| 165 | A jury consists of 12 people who determine which client has the better lawyer. |
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| 166 | A key ring is a handy little gadget that allows you to lose all your keys at once. |
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| 167 | A kid's idea of a balanced diet is a hamburger in each hand. |
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| 168 | A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. That's basic spelling that every woman ought to know.
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| 169 | A ladder was stolen from the store. The manager said that further steps will be taken. |
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| 170 | A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:"You can have mine." |
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| 171 | A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table. |
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| 172 | A leading authority is anyone who has guessed right more than once. |
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| 173 | A lie has no legs to stand on, but it gets places. |
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| 174 | A life... cool.. where can I download one of those? |
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| 175 | A little bit of powder, a little bit of paint, makes a girl's complexion seem what it ain't. |
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| 176 | A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying." |
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| 177 | A little ignorance can go a long way. |
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| 178 | A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation. |
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| 179 | A little lie is like a little pregnancy it doesn't take long before everyone knows. |
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| 180 | A little necrophelia never killed anyone.
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