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1541If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen? Share on Facebook      
1542If you took all the stupid people in the world... you'd have formed Rhode Island. Share on Facebook      
1543If you touch a phosphorous lighting lamp for consecutive hours, you may develop a tumor. Share on Facebook      
1544If you treat every situation like a life or death matter, be prepared to die a lot of times. Share on Facebook      
1545If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie. Share on Facebook      
1546If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? Share on Facebook      
1547If you turn your underwear inside out, you can wear them for another seven days. Share on Facebook      
1548If you understand something today, it must be obsolete. Share on Facebook      
1549If you understand what you're doing, you're not learning anything. Share on Facebook      
1550If you wait to have kids until you can afford them, you probably never will. Share on Facebook      
1551If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital. Share on Facebook      
1552If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen! Share on Facebook      
1553If you want something done, ask someone who is busy! Share on Facebook      
1554If you want the last word in an argument, say, "You're right." Share on Facebook      
1555If you want to be a leader with a large following, just obey the speed limit on a winding, two-lane road. Share on Facebook      
1556If you want to be well liked never lie about yourself, and be careful when telling the truth about others. Share on Facebook      
1557If you want to end your life with a fine finish, drink varish. Share on Facebook      
1558If you want to get along, go along. Share on Facebook      
1559If you want to have the rainbow, you have to put up with the rain. Share on Facebook      
1560If you want to hire a good salesman, look for an ugly man with a beautiful wife. Share on Facebook