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1321If there is light at the end of the tunnel...order more tunnel. Share on Facebook      
1322If there is no GOD, who pops up the next Kleenex? Share on Facebook      
1323If there was a 'Bi-Sexual Pride' parade, would it go both ways? Share on Facebook      
1324If there was a tax on sex, I'd be getting a hefty refund check. Share on Facebook      
1325If there was any justice in this world, oil company executive bathrooms would smell like the ones in their gas stations. Share on Facebook      
1326If there's anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now. Share on Facebook      
1327If there's one thing I can't stand, it's intolerance. Share on Facebook      
1328If there's so much labor-saving machinery, why don't I have more free time? Share on Facebook      
1329If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up there. Share on Facebook      
1330If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me. Share on Facebook      
1331If things get better with age, I'm approaching magnificent! Share on Facebook      
1332If this were a free country, I'd own it by now. Share on Facebook      
1333If those NASA scientists are so smart, why do they all count backwards? Share on Facebook      
1334If time heals all wounds, how come the belly button stays the same. Share on Facebook      
1335If time is money, then how come someone like me that has all the time in the world is still piss poor? Share on Facebook      
1336If tin whistles are made of tin, what are fog horns made of? Share on Facebook      
1337If today is the first day of the rest of your life, what was yesterday? Share on Facebook      
1338If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason. Share on Facebook      
1339If triangles had a God, He'd have three sides. Share on Facebook      
1340If truth is stranger than fiction, you must be truth. Share on Facebook