Browse all oneliners

A   B   C   D   E   F   G   H   I   J   K   L   M   N   O   P   Q   R   S   T   U   V   W   X   Y   Z   Other


981Cannibals won't eat divorced women...they're very bitter. Share on Facebook      
982Cannot find REALITY.SYS...Universe halted. Share on Facebook      
983Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer. But imprisonment turns the state into a gay dungeon-master. Share on Facebook      
984Capitalism can exist in one of two states: Welfare, and Warfare. Share on Facebook      
985Capitalism: the astounding belief that the most wicked of men will do the most wicked of things for the greatest good of everyone. Share on Facebook      
986Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly payment is due. Share on Facebook      
987Carpe Diem = Seize the day. Carp In Denim = Fish in pants. Share on Facebook      
988Carpe Jugulum: Go for the throat. Share on Facebook      
989Carpenter's rule: cut to fit, beat into place. Share on Facebook      
990Carving a canoe isn't that hard. You just take a big block of wood and chip away everything that's not a canoe. Share on Facebook      
991Cat: the other white meat. Share on Facebook      
992Cats make everything taste better. Share on Facebook      
993Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly. Share on Facebook      
994Celebrate life with ketchup! Share on Facebook      
995Celebrity: someone who works all his life to be recognized, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. Share on Facebook      
996Celibacy is not an inherited characteristic. Share on Facebook      
997Celibacy is not hereditary. Share on Facebook      
998Cell phones are also the only thing about which men sit around and brag who's got the smallest. Share on Facebook      
999Cell-phone: a way to speak to yourself without anyone noticing. Share on Facebook      
1000Censorship? We don't have any censorship. If we did, I couldn't say XXXX or XXXX. Share on Facebook