Browse all oneliners

A   B   C   D   E   F   G   H   I   J   K   L   M   N   O   P   Q   R   S   T   U   V   W   X   Y   Z   Other

7081Write your questions down on the back of a $20 dollar bill and send them to me. Share on Facebook      
7082Writing a book is an adventure: to begin with it is a toy and amusement; then it becomes a master, and then it becomes a tyrant; and the last phase is just as you are about to be reconciled to your servitude: you kill the monster and fling him to the public. Share on Facebook      
7083Writing about music is like dancing about architecture. Share on Facebook      
7084Writing free verse is like playing tennis with the net down. Share on Facebook      
7085Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge to market reproductive organs. Share on Facebook      
7086Ya know honey, bigger is not necessarily better; and I can prove it. Share on Facebook      
7087Ya see a guy with one leg, he's got a story. Land mine, '69. Ya see a guy with one arm, he's got a story too. Snowblower, bottle of whiskey. Ya see a guy with one tooth, what would the story be? Well, uh, I like a lot of taffy. Share on Facebook      
7088Yawning is an orgasm for your face. Share on Facebook      
7089Yeah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. Share on Facebook      
7090Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving and I call those people 'the cops,' But you know, sometimes you've just got no choice, those kids gotta get to school. Share on Facebook      
7091Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial. Share on Facebook      
7092Yes, time flies. And where did it leave you? Old too too late. Share on Facebook      
7093Yesterday I found out what doughnuts are for. You put them on doughbolts. They hold dough airplanes together. For kids, they make erector sets out of play-dough. Share on Facebook      
7094Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. Share on Facebook      
7095Yesterday I saw a chicken crossing the road. I asked it why. It told me it was none of my business. Share on Facebook      
7096Yesterday I told a chicken to cross the road. It said, "What for?" Share on Facebook      
7097Yesterday I went to the furniture store and bought myself a "decaffinated" coffee table Share on Facebook      
7098Yesterday today was tomorrow yet tomorrow today will be yesterday. Share on Facebook      
7099Yesterday was the deadline for all complaints. Share on Facebook      
7100Yield to temptation, it may not pass your way again. Share on Facebook