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681There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked'. Share on Facebook      
682They call it "pms" because "mad cow disease" was already taken. Share on Facebook      
683They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak. Share on Facebook      
684They call them fingers, but I've never seen them fing. <Pause> Oh wait - there they go. Share on Facebook      
685They change the sheets every day... from one bed to another. Share on Facebook      
686They couldn't repair my brakes, so they made my horn louder. Share on Facebook      
687They have all sorts of new services today. Now they've got a dial-a-prayer service for atheists. You call a number and nobody answers. Share on Facebook      
688They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck. Share on Facebook      
689They laughed at Einstein. They laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown. Share on Facebook      
690They lived happily until they got married. Share on Facebook      
691They recently changed the dress code at our school; we now must all wear brown hooded smocks and white masks. Another rule was added that all students must talk through electronic voice scramblers. Share on Facebook      
692They say a picture is worth a thousand words, yet the guy at the gallery wouldn't trade me that painting for my newspaper. Share on Facebook      
693They say age is just a number...unless it's your number. Share on Facebook      
694They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance. Share on Facebook      
695They say it is better to give than to receive. I say it depends on the gift. Share on Facebook      
696They say it's never too late to learn to play the piano, but at 2 a.m., I really wish my roommate would quit and go to bed. Share on Facebook      
697They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning. Share on Facebook      
698They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days. Share on Facebook      
699They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what? Who's in a hurry ? Share on Facebook      
700They say that love is the answer, but sex raises some pretty good questions. Share on Facebook