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6741When the knives are in me, I am at peace. Share on Facebook      
6742When the mouth stumbles, it is worse than the foot. Share on Facebook      
6743When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to look like a nail. Share on Facebook      
6744When the pain of staying sober becomes less than the pain of getting drunk, you'll stay sober. Share on Facebook      
6745When the people come, don't call where they're taking you the land of the magic white jackets. It makes them drive faster. Share on Facebook      
6746When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend. Share on Facebook      
6747When the sun comes up, I have morals again. Share on Facebook      
6748When the toilet paper of experience is depleted, the ass of reason goes unwiped. Share on Facebook      
6749When the world gets you down, look up and curse. Share on Facebook      
6750When there's a will, I want to be in it. Share on Facebook      
6751When there's a will, there's a way..when there's a won't, there isn't. Share on Facebook      
6752When there's nothing on TV, most people will watch it anyway. Share on Facebook      
6753When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot both his parents and moved in. Share on Facebook      
6754When they broke open molecules, they found they were only stuffed with atoms. But when they broke open atoms, they found them stuffed with explosions. Share on Facebook      
6755When they say "instant credit," don't they actually mean "instant debt"? Share on Facebook      
6756When they say Doctors are practicing, they aren't kidding. Share on Facebook      
6757When two's company, three's the result. Share on Facebook      
6758When vultures fly, are they allowed carrion luggage? Share on Facebook      
6759When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say 'Its all right'? It isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot'? Share on Facebook      
6760When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven! Share on Facebook