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6361Unless I accept my virtues, I will be overwhelmed with my faults. Share on Facebook      
6362Unless you're the lead dog, the view never changes. Share on Facebook      
6363Urologists never have to advertise: They just open up an office and the patients come trickling in. Share on Facebook      
6364USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population. Share on Facebook      
6365Use of unnecessary violence in the apprehension of the Blues Brothers has been approved. Share on Facebook      
6366Use the best: Linux for servers, Mac for graphics, Windows for Solitaire. Share on Facebook      
6367Use what talents you possess; The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best. Share on Facebook      
6368Usenet is cheaper than drugs, just as addictive, but you have to know how to read! Share on Facebook      
6369Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea: massive, difficult to redirect, awe-inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least expect it. Share on Facebook      
6370Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, and paradise is when you have none. Share on Facebook      
6371Vacation begins when dad says, "I know a short cut." Share on Facebook      
6372Vacation is what you take when you can't take what you've been taking any longer. Share on Facebook      
6373Vanna White has been very sick. She hasn't had a vowel movement since Thursday. Share on Facebook      
6374Vegetarian: Native American definition for "lousy hunter". Share on Facebook      
6375Veni, Vidi, VD. I came, I saw, I cankered. Share on Facebook      
6376Veni, Vidi, Velcro - I came, I saw, I stuck around. Share on Facebook      
6377Veni, vidi, visa. I came. I saw. I did a little shopping. Share on Facebook      
6378Very few things upset my wife. It makes me feel rather special to be one of them. Share on Facebook      
6379Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes. Share on Facebook      
6380Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake. Share on Facebook