Browse all oneliners

A   B   C   D   E   F   G   H   I   J   K   L   M   N   O   P   Q   R   S   T   U   V   W   X   Y   Z   Other

541There are 3 types of people: those who can count, and those who just sit on the couch all day waiting for Ed McMan to call and tell them that they won 11 million dollars. But then since they are of the second type of people, they tell him that they arent interested. Share on Facebook      
542There are 400 hundred words in the dictionary that begin with "self" and only 8 that begin with "fellow". Share on Facebook      
543There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL. Share on Facebook      
544There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the losers. Share on Facebook      
545There are easier things in life than finding a good man... like nailing Jello to a tree, for instance. Share on Facebook      
546There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy. Share on Facebook      
547There are more men than women in mental hospitals... which just goes to show who's driving whom crazy. Share on Facebook      
548There are never any pictures of leather socks when you need them!! Share on Facebook      
549There are never enough hours in the day, but always too many days before Saturday. Share on Facebook      
550There are no bad boys. Just good boys with bad haircuts. Share on Facebook      
551There are no exceptions to the rule that everybody likes to be an exception to the rule. Share on Facebook      
552There are no new sins...the old ones just get more publicity. Share on Facebook      
553There are no short cuts to any place worth going. Share on Facebook      
554There are no stupid questions, but there are a lot of inquisitive idiots. Share on Facebook      
555There are no substitutes for fresh air, sunshine and exercise. Share on Facebook      
556There are no winners in life...only survivors. Share on Facebook      
557There are only five people in the world and two of them are hamburgers. Share on Facebook      
558There are only two enterprises that refer to their customers as "users," and one is illegal. Share on Facebook      
559There are only two kinds of people in the world - there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning." Share on Facebook      
560There are only two times when I drink...when I'm alone or when I'm with someone. Share on Facebook