Browse all oneliners

A   B   C   D   E   F   G   H   I   J   K   L   M   N   O   P   Q   R   S   T   U   V   W   X   Y   Z   Other


441I looked up my wife's family tree. Most of her relatives are still climbing around in it. Share on Facebook      
442I lost a button hole today. Where am I gonna find another one? Share on Facebook      
443I lost a buttonhole today. Share on Facebook      
444I lost my mind! I think my kids took it. Share on Facebook      
445I lost my virginity, but I still have the box it came in. Share on Facebook      
446I lost twenty pounds. Unfortunately, I was in England at the time. Share on Facebook      
447I love animals, they taste great. Share on Facebook      
448I love animals. They're delicious. Share on Facebook      
449I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Share on Facebook      
450I love cats, they taste just like chicken. Share on Facebook      
451I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food. Share on Facebook      
452I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by. Share on Facebook      
453I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy Share on Facebook      
454I love eating GRITS...Girls Raised In The South Share on Facebook      
455I love Fear Factor, but I think they're running out of fears. It's only a matter of time before they're sitting around doing shots of Hepatitis C. Share on Facebook      
456I love little kids. I just can't always eat a whole one. Share on Facebook      
457I love men, even though they're lying, cheating scumbags. Share on Facebook      
458I love the lines the men use to get us into bed. 'Please, I'll only put it in for a minute.' What am I, a microwave? Share on Facebook      
459I love the Stones! I can't believe they're still doing it after all these years. I watch 'em whenever I can, Fred and Barney. Share on Facebook      
460I love to give homemade gifts. Which one of my kids do you want? Share on Facebook