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401My wife will buy anything marked down. Last year she bought an escalator. Share on Facebook      
402My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was. Share on Facebook      
403My wife's version of money laundering is cleaning out my pockets every night while I am asleep. Share on Facebook      
404My wild oats have turned to shredded wheat! Share on Facebook      
405My worst day of vacation has always been better than my best day at work. Share on Facebook      
406My worst day sober is better than my best day drunk. Share on Facebook