Browse all oneliners

A   B   C   D   E   F   G   H   I   J   K   L   M   N   O   P   Q   R   S   T   U   V   W   X   Y   Z   Other


361The only truly consistent people are dead Share on Facebook      
362The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. Share on Facebook      
363The only way to have safe sex is to abstain... from drinking. Share on Facebook      
364The only way to make a dream come true is to wake up and live it. Share on Facebook      
365The only way you could get stupider is to get bigger. Share on Facebook      
366The opinion of the intelligent is better than the certainty of the ignorant. Share on Facebook      
367The optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears it is true. Share on Facebook      
368The other day I... no wait, that wasn't me. Share on Facebook      
369The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree. Share on Facebook      
370The other day, I was walking my dog around my building... on the ledge. Share on Facebook      
371The other day, I was walking my dog around my building... on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths. Share on Facebook      
372The other day, I went to a tourist information booth and said, 'Tell me about some of the people who were here last year'. Share on Facebook      
373The other line always moves faster. Share on Facebook      
374The other night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an argument going. Share on Facebook      
375The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys. I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while. I was speeding, and a cop pulled me over. He asked where I lived. I said, "Right here, officer." Share on Facebook      
376The pain is the arrow coming out, not the arrow going in. Share on Facebook      
377The paperless office will become a reality about the same time as the paperless toilet. Share on Facebook      
378The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with. Share on Facebook      
379The penalty for success is to be bored by the people who used to snub you. Share on Facebook      
380The people who vote decide nothing. The people who count the votes decide everything Share on Facebook