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201You're old when your sweetie says, "Lets go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Honey, I can't do both!" Share on Facebook      
202You're ready for sobriety when the alcohol doesn't work anymore Share on Facebook      
203You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter. Share on Facebook      
204You're so ugly, a canibal would take one look at you, and order salad. Share on Facebook      
205You're so ugly, you could practice birth control just by leaving the lights on! Share on Facebook      
206You're special. Like, wear-a-helmet-all-the-time special. Share on Facebook      
207You've been a bad girl. Go to my room. Share on Facebook      
208You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven. Share on Facebook      
209You've never been truly drunk until you've had to use a barstool as a walker to get home. Share on Facebook      
210You, me, whipped cream, handcuffs. Any questions? Share on Facebook      
211Young men may exaggerate, but old men pretend. Share on Facebook      
212Young son: "Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad: "That happens in every country, son." Share on Facebook      
213Your actions speak so loud that I can't hear what you're saying. Share on Facebook      
214Your body would look good in my trunk. Share on Facebook      
215Your brain is that bodily organ which starts working the moment you awake and does not stop until you get into the office. Share on Facebook      
216Your child has started growing up when he stops asking you where he came from and starts refusing to tell you where he's going. Share on Facebook      
217Your children know you love them by your presence, not your presents. Share on Facebook      
218Your conscience never stops you from doing anything. It just stops you from enjoying it. Share on Facebook      
219Your e-mail has been returned due to insufficient intelligence. Share on Facebook      
220Your future depends on your dreams - So go to sleep! Share on Facebook