Funniest One Liners!

1Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup? Share on Facebook      
2Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as meaningless experiences go, it's pretty good Share on Facebook      
3I searched for the bluebird of happiness, and found the chicken of despair. Share on Facebook      
4Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. Share on Facebook      
5Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage. Lettuce pray... Share on Facebook      
6People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first. Share on Facebook      
7Universal truth: Bricks are horrible to carry. Share on Facebook      
8America is a land where citizens vote for Democrats but hope to live like Republicans. Share on Facebook      
9A man on a date wonders if he'll get lucky. The woman already knows. Share on Facebook      
10The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles. Share on Facebook      
11If you're too lazy to start anything, you may get a reputation for patience Share on Facebook      
12My mind is like concrete: thoroughly mixed up and permanently set. Share on Facebook      
13Your e-mail has been returned due to insufficient intelligence. Share on Facebook      
14Here at First National, you're not just a number - you're two numbers, a dash, three more numbers, another dash, and another number. Share on Facebook      
15Look before you leak, for he who hesitates gets wet shoes. Share on Facebook      
16Our school is very low-budgeted; our physics book is so out of date the last chapter deals with combustion. Share on Facebook      
17Sign seen in a bar: "Those drinking to forget please pay in advance." Share on Facebook      
18If the frictional force is greater than the applied force, does the object move backwards? Share on Facebook      
19The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom. Share on Facebook      
20You can't prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but can prevent them from building their nest on it. Share on Facebook