| 1 | Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. |
   |
| 2 | Just because I don't care doesn't mean I do... |
|
| 3 | To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target. |
|
| 4 | People like you are the reason people like me need medication. |
|
| 5 | Short version of the Serenity Prayer - "Screw it. |
|
| 6 | If you can keep your head while all about are losing theirs and blaming it on you - perhaps you have underestimated the seriousness of the situation. |
|
| 7 | There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary, and those who don't. |
|
| 8 | Snowbank: where you keep your extra snow. |
|
| 9 | Well I'm the king of the swingers, see, the jungle V.I.P. But I've reached the top and I've had to stop, and that's what's been bothering me. |
|
| 10 | Give me liberty, or give me a bran muffin! |
|
| 11 | A world without war; a dream to some, a nightmare to the arms manufacturers. |
|
| 12 | Life is what happens to you while you are planning to do something else. |
|
| 13 | I saw a tree fall in the woods, and I didn't hear it. |
|
| 14 | Wisdom is a comb given to a man once he is bald. |
|
| 15 | My Chinese girlfriend said "You shit in bed"... so I did. |
|
| 16 | Cancer research is a growth industry. |
|
| 17 | If you stand in one place long enough, you make a line. |
|
| 18 | Don't force it, get a larger hammer. |
|
| 19 | What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? A speech impediment. |
|
| 20 | Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?
|
|
